Validate Yourself

by Rachel Miller

March 22, 2022

ABOVE : Sebastian Pociecha

When you strive to be the best version of yourself, you give up the liberty to wallow and indulge in self-pity. You give up the reward of praise and adulation from others. You let go of all these things–you’ve outgrown these things. But at the same time, you’ve gained something better in return: now, you can validate yourself.


  • Don’t look to others for validation. Instead, provide yourself the recognition you need. Only you know the extent of your efforts. You are the only one who knows the depth of what it takes to deliver your best. You are the only one who knows what you’ve overcome to get to where you are now. You are the only person truly qualified to validate your efforts!

  • Think of those small things we do that we quietly desire recognition for: pushing past comfort, being productive when it’s hard, pressing on when you’re not feeling well—these things that we secretly wish others would understand the extent of our efforts for. Give that validation to yourself! Encourage yourself in your daily efforts.

  • Next time you find yourself wanting to complain or struggling with the weight of your daily battles and responsibilities, consider:
    • It can feel like no one understands you, that you’re only one doing this–especially when it’s hard. Know that you’re not alone. Others feel this way too. We just don’t talk about it. We don’t talk about the mental challenges and internal battles. There are others quietly battling on next to you around you–they understand you. They feel you–I feel you!
    • Think of those challenges you face day in and day out—those mental battles, that internal struggle—those small triumphs hidden from the rest of the world. No one can acknowledge the great accomplishment of that effort but you! Give yourself validation. You know yourself best and you can rely on yourself at any time. Only you can provide yourself the true validation that you deserve and need.

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